Nearly everyone who knows me knows that I am a die-hard Yankees fan. Why then do I actively root against the Mets when my beloved Yanks have been eliminated from the playoffs?
Because the Mets remind me of everything that's bad about New York. For starters, Shea Stadium is an ahistorical box under a flight path and bordered by a parking lot built by the reprehensible Robert Moses, destroyer of neighborhoods, enabler of sprawl and general all-around jerk. What's the most endearing thing about Shea? It's the paper-mache-esque apple that rises from a hat whenever a Met hits a home run (see above). An apple. Coming out of a hat. Puh-leeze.
More importantly, the Mets came about a few years after the Giants and Dodgers decamped for California, leaving beautiful but emply stadia and millions of distraught fans in their wake.
As if some expansion team with loud uniforms and a bobble-headed mascot would make up for decades of history. As if!
The Mets remind me of the Queens Midtown Tunnel, of Duane Reade, of white-brick apartment buildings on the Upper East Side. The Mets are Moses and Le Corbusier. The Yankees are Olmsted.
That's why I root against the Mets.
But the Yankees are evil.
That's the high level of discourse I expect!